Chapter 19

I strongly believe that kids need structure.  My time with Sandy and Larry was the first structure I ever had.  Every day when we came home from school, we had to sit at the kitchen table and do homework for one hour whether we had it or not.  Then, we had to practice our instruments for 30 minutes.  I had taken up the clarinet.  Let’s just say I became a much better singer than clarinet player, but the 30 minutes of practice each day helped!  My new brother, Brad, played the drums and was in the marching band at Davenport Central High School.  Thank goodness we practiced at different times!  Each weekend, we all had different chores that had to be done before we could do anything, including enjoy our awesome pool.  I had to clean the kitchen from top to bottom.  Sandy and Larry had given me a great gift that I would take with me when I left them ~ the gift of structure.  And, of course, the importance of a clean kitchen.  I also believe kids need an exorbitant amount of love.  Sandy and Larry lacked quite a bit in this department, but this was something I was used to.  When I moved in, Sandy and Larry set up my bedroom in the basement just off the family room where we would spend many nights together.  I was their first and only foster child.  The only downside was my bedroom had no door ~ no real privacy.  I wanted my older foster sister Karen’s room.  I wanted to be Karen.  She was tall, slim and always tan.  She was so cool.  And we got along great right from the start.  She let me go with her everywhere.  I adored her.  And she adored me.  Until she didn’t.  This occurred abruptly on my 13^th birthday.  Like any young girl, I was ecstatic my 13^th birthday had finally arrived.  I was a teenager!  I awoke that morning with such excitement.  I had dressed up for school and came upstairs early for my birthday breakfast with my family.  Not everyone was as prompt as I, but I could be patient.  But Brad hadn’t even gotten out of bed yet!  I went in to his room and heard his alarm going off, but he wasn’t in bed.  Maybe he was in the bathroom, I thought.  I leaned over to turn off his alarm and that’s when I saw him.  He wasn’t in the bathroom.  He was slumped on the floor between his bed and the wall.  I saw immediately that his fingernails were blue.  My scream finally brought everyone to breakfast.